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Wednesday 30 April 2008

Overloaded by Laundry

Today I'm slightly pissed-off with myself that I caved in and am doing every ones laundry. Three weeks ago I decided I was no longer going to be a slave to the washer and dryer and make Hubby and the kids do their own wash (it's not too much to ask, is it???). Well, I kept my end of the bargain, I wash my own laundry, do the towels and bedding etc., but I was the only one. The pile is massive!!! And I'm not exaggerating! I started washing on Sunday and today is Wednesday, I might be half way to the summit of Mt. Filthyclothes.
(I would have taken a photo of the pile, but I would have been too embarrassed for anyone to see)
Cartoon courtesy of Dave Walker at We Blog Cartoons.

In another three - maybe four, five days I will be finished, and my house will be back to ‘normal’ (and I use the term loosely). But for now I have taken up residence down in the dungeon. I am permitted to come up ever so often for food and drink. There is little dialog, just my ranting and raving like a madwoman.

I'm seriously considering charging the older two kids and the Hubby for every load I do of theirs - $5 a load, wash dried and folded.

What's this Bitch so happy about???
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Tuesday 29 April 2008

Weighty Ghost - Wintersleep

This is one of those songs that gets into your head and you find yourself humming little parts of it for days.

I got out of bed today, Swear to God I couldn't see my face
I got out of bed today staring at a ghost
Who forgot to float away, didn't have all that much to say
Wouldn't even tell me his own name
And where'd my body go

Where oh where'd my body go?
Africa or Mexico?
Where or where'd my body go?
And where'd my body go?

Oh have you seen my ghost?
Seen my ghost, seen my ghost?
Oh have you seen my ghost?
Staring at the ground?
Oh have you seen my ghost?
Seen my ghost, seen my ghost?
Oh have you seen my ghost?
Sick of those goddamn clouds.

Are you some kind of medicine man?
Cut the demons out of my head
You can't kill something that's already dead
So leave my soul alone
I don't need no surgery
Take those knives away from me
Just wanna die in my own body
A ghost just needs a home

Oh have you seen my ghost?
Seen my ghost, seen my ghost?
Oh have you seen my ghost?
Staring at the ground?
Oh have you seen my ghost?
Seen my ghost, seen my ghost?
Oh have you seen my ghost?
Sick of those goddamn clouds.

Na na na na na na na....

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Saturday 26 April 2008

Beers, Steak & Porn

These three things have absolutely nothing to do with this post, but now that I have your attention...

Take a look at these lovely tea cups and saucers I found today!

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Friday 25 April 2008

Friday Fill-In #69

1. When I fell in love with him, I gave him my heart and he's kept it safe!
2. I'm looking forward to when the flowers bloom and it heats up outside!
3. Oh no! The internet connection is down, the kids will all go into withdrawal.
4. All in the Family is the craziest tv show ever.
5. Cheese and crackers make a great meal?
6. I never have much luck with vegetables in a garden.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to nadda, tomorrow my plans include shopping for shorts and T's with my two girls and Sunday, I want to tackle a mountain of laundry!!

Thursday 24 April 2008

Oxymorons A-J


I know, I know, I got nothing! It must be this enormous brain cloud that has been fogging up my head all morning.

Possible reasons for such a massive brain fog are:

Hunger - In my BPA frenzied state yesterday, I tossed out everything in the house worth eating. The only thing worthwhile in the refrigerator is beer, and it's much too early for that.

Or...The government found out that I have figured out their superior race plan, and scrambled my brain waves. (Must look for instructions for constructing a tin foil hat to stop them from controlling my mind) hehehe!

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Wednesday 23 April 2008

Black Helicopters - BPA scare

I must say, I am a little freaked out with the whole BPA scare here in Canada. At first I figured it was overblown but after reading more about it and seeing numerous news reports on the TV this week, it's really starting to worry me.

I came up with a theory the other night while discussing the topic with the family - Our Government, drug companies and physicians are all in cahoots, sick people=$$. Or perhaps our government is trying to create a superior race, a race with big breasted women and men with giant testicals. (I realize there are some flaws to my theories, they are a work in progress)
My husband is laughing at me, asking me if I've been seeing black helicopters following me.
(this is all in jest people, please don't contact the men in the white coats just yet)

What is BPA?
Bisphenol-A is the starting material for polycarbonate plastic. The most common trade name for it is Lexan. It is showing up in plastics, cosmetics, bottled drinking water, food containers and a variety of other mediums.

Bisphenol A is considered one of the most hazardous chemicals presently in use. BPA has been shown to interfere with more than 200 genes. At some of the very lowest doses, studies found that BPA caused permanent alterations of breast and prostate cells that precede cancer, insulin resistance (linked to diabetes), and chromosomal damage linked to recurrent miscarriage and a wide range of birth defects including Downs Syndrome.

Environmental Defense Canada has called on the government to ban Bisphenol A immediately. Dr. Rick Smith, Executive Director of Environmental Defense argues, “The case for a federal ban on this chemical has never been stronger.” Smith notes that the chemical management process will take years to come to a conclusion about BPA, during which time Canadians will continue to be exposed to it.

Things like this scare the living shit out of me!
Today you will find me sifting though all our plastic containers and ridding my cupboards of products that may be questionable - I'm going back to the basics people. I might even consider moving to the country, growing my own organic produce and raise my own chickens.
(Hubby, don't have a kitten - I'm not quite to that point... yet!)

Environmental Health Association of Nova Scotia
Globe and Mail
Environmental Defence

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Ass over tea kettle

Now I know what people mean when they use the expression - "Ass over tea kettle".
Thats exactly what I did at 2 AM while heading downstairs to get a drink of water. I don't think there is one part of my body that doesn't ache today.

Some helpful hints to avoid falling down stairs:

1. Turn on the lights before heading down stairs.
2. Never leave things (a stack of magazines) on steps.
3. Always grab the hand rail, it's there for a reason!!!
4. Walk, don't run!!!

Tuesday 22 April 2008

Comin' Right Down on Top of Me

(Wasn't feeling photoshop today)

Is the sky really fallin'
Or does it just seem that way
Wheres my reasons for livin'
Have they all slipped away

Its comin' right down on top of me
And gettin' so I cant hardly breathe
Its comin' right down on top of me
Just let me be

When something feels good
You can't leave it alone
And when good luck turns bad
It seems everything goes wrong

Baby, its comin' right down on top of me
Its gettin' so I cant hardly breathe
Its comin' right down on top of me
It just wont let me be, wont let me be

The morning wont face the day
And how does life ever get this way
Wont somebody set me free
It just wont let me be, wont let me be
Just wont let me be, just wont let me be
It just wont let me be, it just wont let me be
It just wont let me be, set me free
Wont someone set me free (somebody set me free)
Somebody set me free (set me free, set me free)
It just wont....
It just wont let me be
It just wont let me be

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Monday 21 April 2008

Weekend updates:

Friday night mini-midlife meltdown

I decided to do absolutely nothing Friday night. Sitting in the living room flipping though some old decorating magazine I came to a section of pages I had dog-eared a long time ago. It was photos of a newly decorated living room, dinning room and kitchen. I loved (and still do) the look of these rooms, and since first seeing them ages ago when I purchased the magazine, I had dreams of making my home look like the home in the article. Then I started thinking about all the things I thought I should have at this point in my life - but don't. And because this is how my crazy mind has been functioning lately, thoughts of mortality and what I've accomplished in life flooded my head. I spend a lot of time lately angry, depressed, or frustrated with my lack of a sense of purpose/social skills/preparation for our financial future/my home/lack of career/and material things I've always wanted. I got mad at Hubby for not being worried enough about our future. And picked at him so much in bed, that he went and slept on the sofa. Needless to say – neither of us got good nights sleep.
If this is the beginning of a mid-life crisis then pass the Prozac please, I think I'm going to need it!!!

Saturday is a blur

Saturday I wasn't in the mood for much. Did a little shopping and ran some errands with Hubby and before I knew it the day was over. I was still in a mood but not to the extent of Fridays.

Sunday is looking up

Feeling Friday's funk slowly disappear, we went to the market and picked up some goodies for a BBQ - our first this season. It was a nice change from the usually boring Sunday roast.

Ps: Thanks to Hubby who made such a delicious meal, including the biscuits for the shortcakes...Yummy!

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Friday 18 April 2008

Friday Fill In #68

1. The last time I lost my temper I said some mean things I regret saying now!
2. Picking up after my family is what I'm fed up with!
3. The next book I'd like to read is The Ten-Year Nap, by Meg Wolitzer.
4. Beach weather is what I'm looking forward to.
5. If you can't get rid of the skeleton[s] in your closet, at least make peace with them!
6. The best thing I got in the mail recently was coupons.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to spending the evening at home, tomorrow my plans include nothing in particular and Sunday, I want to do some yard clean up (weather permitting)!

Wednesday 16 April 2008

Things that make me smile

Today the sun is shining and life is good!

"Sunshine is a welcome thing. It brings a lot of brightness." - Jimmie Davis

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Monday 14 April 2008

The He-Man Women Haters Club

No Women Allowed!

Every year, usually within the first few weeks of May, Hubby and his posse get together for their annual fishing tip to their camp in the wilderness. This group of four men boys have been friends since their childhood/teen years, and keep in touch periodically throughout the year.

The trip preparations are underway, and although the trip isn’t for another 4 weeks, they all have been busy getting their ducks all in a row. These four men have one thing, and one thing only on their minds this time of year - the all mighty May Fly! They are in constant contact with one another by phone, email or drop-ins; they make lists, get supplies ready, figure out transportation details, and organize gear. Their plans are flawless, down the last teensy-weensy detail. Me, I quietly sit back and take note, all of this pruning and primping can (
and will) be used to my advantage later on. I will use little tidbits throughout the year when the need arises:
Hubby: I don’t understand why it takes a week to find earrings for that particular dress!
Me: For the same reason it takes weeks to find the “perfect” fishing vest/waders/line/flies!
Works every time, he immediately stop his bitching and moaning and helps me pick out earrings/belt/boots.

14 years ago the boys built a camp together (
oh if those walls could talk, what tales they’d tell!) a cozy home-away-from-home, a wilderness paradise. They call it Chateau M_________ (I was asked not to post the “full” name for fear of giving away the location of their Wilderness Wonderland); I call it The He-Man Women Haters Club, Hubby likes this name too. They are a great group of guys, sometimes they argue, but never stay mad at one another for very long because they have one love in common – The love of Fly Fishing!

I admire their spirit and camaraderie; they are a brotherhood, amigos, friends till the end. I’ll admit I am a tad envious of their friendship. If I said I wasn’t – I would be a liar.

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Saturday 12 April 2008

The Cradle Will Rock (part 2)

...................Finally! Baby L's cradle is finished!....................

Few! Finished the cradle a day late but I couldn't be happier with the end result. Made a minor change with the colour of the cradle, and I decided to go with the sage bedding instead of pink.

Baby L look so beautiful in her new bed!  A special thanks goes out to my Dad who is a master at his craft. Thanks Daddy!

Friday 11 April 2008

Friday Fill-Ins

1. I love springtime in the public gardens!
2. Veggie omelets and fresh fruit are foods I love to eat for breakfast.
3. It seems I'm always searching for my slippers.
4. Cuddling up on the sofa with my man is a great way to end the day.
5. I think I will go out and buy new bedding tonight!
6. BBQ is what I've been craving lately.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to shopping, tomorrow my plans include a date with the husband and bringing my new niece her cradle and Sunday, I want to take a walk downtown if the weather co-operates!

Thursday 10 April 2008

To Hell in a Handcart

Today is turning to shit at an alarming fast and furious rate. I want to crawl back into my bed, pull the covers over my head and disappear for the rest of the day - ahhh, if only.

Baby Girl's anxiety attacks are getting worse and her moods are inconsistent these last few days - happy, sad, worried, happy again. I fear she's slipping into a depressive state so I've contacted her Neurologist and am impatiently waiting for his office to call back with an appointment time. They are always so booked up and very rarely will take you right away, sometimes it takes weeks, even months to get in to see him. This is one of the pitfalls of having a "free" health care system- you get what you get.

Miss Priss has an appointment to see a Rheumatoid Arthritis Specialist today, and wants me to go in with her. I didn't even know that people get Rheumatoid Arthritis at age 20, apparently they can, even younger but it is rare. Now to add a little more drama to poor Priss' life, she just received a phone call from her Cardiologist telling her she needs to be seen by him ASAP. When it rains it pours!

Two years ago she collapsed at her job and was rushed to the ER where they discovered she had a cardiac condition call WPW, or a short circuit in her heart - A ticking time bomb. She had a procedure called an ablation, where they (sort of) cauterize the abnormal electrical pathway. That was successful but she is now experiencing some tachyarrhythmia again which may be cause for some concern.

Now I'm a panicky mess! Priss on the other hand, appears to be cool, calm and collective - she gets that from her father.

Tuesday 8 April 2008

The Cradle Will Rock

Update: Thursday, April 10

I've decided to keep all the cradle and baby L updates all on the same post. It could take me a few days to finish the cradle, seems the weather is going to be crap today and I will be unable to varathane it until Friday.

Ella did finally make a grand entrance into the world yesterday evening, weighing 7lbs 15 oz. Mommy, Daddy and Baby L are all doing fine.

Update: Wednesday, April 9

Started staining the cradle and as it turns out, just on time. We received word this morning that Mommy-to-be is in the hospital and baby L is due to make her grand entrance later this afternoon or early evening.

Hope she loves the cradle!

Fit for a Princess:

The cradle I had made for the newest member of our family, Niece #4 - Baby Ella. Baby L hasn't arrived yet but we are expecting her any day now. I was just visiting with mommy-to-be last night and she's very anxious and excited. Her doctor is saying baby is going to be around 10 lbs give or take - now that's a good size baby!

Thank you to my Dad who was able to construct the cradle in under a week. Everything is all finished except for the stain and varnish and I'm hoping I will be able to get started on that this afternoon. Can't wait to see the finished product with all the pink ruffly bedding.

Moon over Marin

While searching for some stock photos of beaches I came across this one. It made me think of the song Moon Over Marin by the Dead Kennedys. It was also covered by Matthew Good which is my favorite version.

Soldiers from the South Korean army clean up crude-oil spills over Mallipo Beach after an accident involving a Hong Kong-registered tanker in Taean, about 106 miles southwest of Seoul, on December 10, 2007.

The crowded future stings my eyes
I still find time to exercise
In uniform with two white stripes

Unlock my section of the sand
It's fenced off to the water's edge
I clamp a gasmask on my head

On my beach at night
Bathe in my moonlight

Another tanker's hit the rocks
Abandoned to spill out its guts
The sand is laced with sticky glops

O' Shimmering moonlight sheen upon
The waves and water clogged with oil
White gases steam up from the soil

I squash dead fish between my toes
Try not to step on any bones
I turn around and I go home

I slip back through my basement door
Switch off all that I own below
Dive in my scalding wooden tub

My own beach at night
Electric Moonlight
There will always be a moon Over Marin

Monday 7 April 2008

I've just closed my eyes again...

Dreams have a long history both as a subject of conjecture and as a source of inspiration. Throughout their history, people have sought meaning in dreams or divination through dreams. Sigmund Freud and Carl Jung identified dreams as an interaction between the unconscious mind and the conscious. They also assert together that the unconscious is the dominant force of the dream, and in dreams it conveys its own mental activity to the perceptive faculty. While Freud felt that there was an active censorship against the unconscious even during sleep, Jung argued that the dream's bizarre quality is an efficient language, comparable to poetry and uniquely capable of revealing the underlying meaning.

Recurring dream:
While the content of most dreams is dreamed only once, many people experience recurring dreams—that is, the same dream narrative is experienced over different occasions of sleep.

" ...Climbed aboard the dream weaver train.."

Friday night I had another water dream. I think my sub-conscious may be trying to tell me something because water seems to be in all my dreams lately. The dream was about a flood and although I couldn't see any water, I knew there was going to be a great flood. In this dream I'm panicked and am driving around an unfamiliar neighborhood searching for my kids and husband. I need to located them before the flood happens.

Saturday night I dreamed of a tidal wave. Hubby and I were parked at a beach parking lot listening to music and chatting. I noticed something odd about the direction the waves were going. They were large waves but they were starting at the shoreline and moving out toward the ocean - not towards the shore. I pointed this anomaly out to hubby and told him we should get moving because the waves were growing larger and larger. He took my face in his hands and kissed me, he said "silly girl, the waves aren't going to reach the parking lot because they are moving out to sea in the opposite direction - See". We turn our gaze back to the ocean just as the waves change direction and start crashing in the parking lot. The car starts to flood and hubby is panicky trying to start the car. I wake up.

Sunday night the dream was about water again but this time it's neither a wave nor flood. I'm walking along a path on my way to pick up my daughter at a friends house. The path starts to narrow and I loose my footing and fall down an embankment which is filled with trash and dirty water. I try to grab onto the ground around me so I can pull myself back up the embankment but the ground is too soupy and I keep falling back into the dirty water. I'm panicked trying to get out because I know my daughter is waiting for me to come get her.

Obviously water is the re-occurring theme in my dreams of late. I think I shall do a bit of research and try to sort out these odd dreams.

Music interlude to get you through the rest of this post

Some quick searches for dreams about water- Floods, tidal waves, muddy water.
Dreams Foundation

Tidal Waves:
A tidal wave is a very strong symbol and can simply indicate that there is something stronger and more powerful that will just sweep us away without warning. It may symbolize our wish to protect some vulnerable family member. But tidal waves are also symbolic of our feelings. They may show that we are overcome with strong feelings on an issue. The sea in dreams symbolizes the feelings we have and the land the facts about some issue.
For the sea to sweep over the land shows that we are making very emotional decisions, possibly based on insufficient evidence.

A flood stands for some emotions and cravings which are so strong that they overrun you. The clear flood water means a positive outcome and a dirty water is not a good omen. Watching a flood means that you are dealing with people who you are bothering you with petitions and requests. Seeing a flooded room predicts bad luck and fighting. If you are trying to outrun the flood, you are running away from yourself.
(Haven't found any dream interpretation for a flood that's about to occur)

Muddy water:
A dream of muddy water foretells sadness or sorry for the dreamer through hearing of an illness or death of someone he/she knows well. Dirty water warns of unscrupulous people who would bring you to ruin.

Friday 4 April 2008

Friday Fill In #66

1. Tonight I saw Autism the Musical, a documentary about Autistic kids and families.
2. Listening to Abba makes me wanna dance!
3. Splitting a few appetizers between friends and sharing a bottle of wine is a great way to spend an evening.
4. is someone I'd like to get to know better. (I would like to get to know all my fellow fill-inrs)
5. The smell of apple blossom reminds me so much of springtime!
6. A little kiss and hug and that made it all better.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to finishing up the baby cradle, tomorrow my plans include sanding and staining it and Sunday, I want to go to a matinée with the family!

Thursday 3 April 2008

Thankful Thursday

Today is a thankful Thursday. Thankful that Baby-Girl was able to work through the problem that was causing all her anxiety yesterday. She worked it out all on her own and was able to stay at school all day - this is a big step for her. Last night she felt confident enough to go into the mall with a couple friends on the bus. This may sound like a "no biggie" thing for most but for her it was huge. She thought she was going to vomit at one point, but talked herself through the panic and did it. I'm so proud of her! Yay Baby-Girl!

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Wednesday 2 April 2008

Don't worry dear - it's all in your head

Palpitations - a pounding heart, or an accelerated heart rate - Sweating - Trembling or shaking - Shortness of breath - A choking sensation - Chest pain or discomfort - Nausea or stomach cramps - De-realization (a feeling of unreality) - Fear of losing control or going crazy - Fear of dying - Numbness or a tingling sensation - Chills or hot flashes …some symptoms of a panic or anxiety disorder attack.

Imagine having anyone of these anxiety symptoms. Then add to that, Obsessive Compulsive disorder and Tourettes in the mix. Just one of these disorders alone is hard enough for any one to deal with but imagine someone who has all of the above, and that someone is only 15.

My 15-year-old Daughter has Tourettes, Anxiety and Obsessive Compulsive disorders. She very smart, does well in school and has a tremendous talent when it comes to the arts. She sings, writes music, plays piano, bass guitar and guitar, draws, and has taken it upon herself to learn Japanese. I believe there is nothing this kid can't do - including learning to cope and deal with her anxiety.

This morning baby girl was having an obvious panic attack about going to school. Being late as usual, there wasn't a whole lot of time to discuss what was causing her anxiety, so I quickly tried to address the issue she was having, wiped away her tears and sent her out the door. My first instincts as a mother are to protect my children and keep them safe. It's hard for me to see my daughter in so much pain and so scared and not be able to help her.

I'm sitting here worried sick about her, to the point of obsessing (the apple doesn't fall far from the tree you see). Sure the phone will ring, positive she will call before the school day is over. Hoping she will be able to work through the anxiety all on her own but – knowing deep down, this is only the beginning.

Tuesday 1 April 2008


You may think it's funny, but it's snot

Sitting at my desk yesterday I noticed a peculiar smear trailing down the rail of the stairwell that leads to my second floor. As I sat here staring at the odd stain on the wall, it occurred to me what it was - "Ewww grosse! Is that SNOT"?! I hurry to the bathroom to get a pair of latex gloves, some bleach, and a sponge. I spray and scrub, gagging all the while, wondering which one of my pretty little nieces left this little green gift for me? I wonder how many dried-crusted gifts they leave on their own walls at home? Eww Eww Eww! It's surprising how hard it is to remove dried snot and boogies stuck to a wall. I'm scrubbing for all I'm worth and the spot does vanish but it takes some of the paint with it.

Why, why, why do children do this sort of thing, don't they realize how totally disgusting it is? I tried to remember a time when I had to clean up dried snot that was left by my own children when they were younger, but I don't think I ever had to - perhaps they just found better hiding spots!

So now what? I'm sitting here right now trying to decide whether or not to confront the two *boogie* monsters when they come over later today. I'm sure neither would admit to such a disgusting act. They would both deny doing it and blame the other and I'm sure it will turn into a yelling match between the two. Maybe I’ll just give them a simple hygiene lesson, explaining how wiping bodily fluids on walls and other objects, is impolite (and utterly f@#$ing disgusting). Then teach them how to use a tissue.

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